Domestic Violence Resources
1 in 3 women experiences domestic violence.
Domestic violence (also called intimate partner violence (IPV), domestic abuse or relationship abuse) is a pattern of behaviors used by one partner to maintain power and control over another partner in an intimate relationship. Domestic violence does not discriminate. Anyone of any race, age, sexual orientation, religion or gender can be a victim – or perpetrator – of domestic violence. It can happen to people who are married, living together or who are dating. It affects people of all socioeconomic backgrounds and education levels.
Domestic abuse can occur at any stage of the relationship. Shame, embarrassment, guilt. fear are just a few reasons those who are abused stay in and often protect the abusive relationship. Break the cycle, if not for you for your children(especially our daughters).
Signs of Abuse(Abuser Tricks and Warning Signs)
- Jealousy. Jealousy is not love. May check up on you or call you frequently(several times an hour). May accuse you of flirting or become jealous of time spent with others.
- Controlling Behaviour. May limit your financial or physical freedom
- Quick Involvement. The abuser will pressure the potential partner to commit right away.
- Love Bombing is a form of emotional abuse. It is a manipulative tool to influence another person with over-the-top displays of attention and affection. The cycle of Love Bombing: Idealization, Devaluation, Discard.
- Unrealistic Expectations. Expectation to meet all of the abuser’s needs, to take care of everything emotionally and domestically. You cannot “fill” up their cup completely.
- Isolation An attempt to isolate the target by severing their ties to outside support and resources and friends and family. The abuser will accuse the victim’s friends and family of being “trouble makers.”.
- Blames Others for Problems. The victim will be blamed for everything.
- Blames Others for Feelings. Uses feelings to manipulate others.
- Hypersensitivity. The abusive person is easily insulted or offended.
- “Playful” Use of Force in Sex. Restraining partners against their will during sex, acting out fantasies in which the partner is helpless, initiating sex when the partner is asleep, or demanding sex when the partner is ill or tired. Pouting or sulking is the partner does not comply.
- Cruelty towards Children or Animals. May tease children until they cry. Threaten to harm and/or harm animals, usually to punish you.
- Verbal Abuse
- Dr. Jeckyl and Mr. Hyde Personality. Quick personality changes and messages from I love you to I hate you.
- Breaking or Striking Things.
- Often breaks sentimental items in fits of rage to punish you.
- Threats of Violence. Negatively invades your space, like screaming in your face or following you during an argument when you ask to table the conversation. No boundaries, but bullying.
- Any Force during an Argument. Holding down his the victim, physically restraining the victim from leaving, or pushing or shoving.
The National Domestic Violence Hotline
Futures Without Violence: The National Health Resource Center on Domestic Violence